The Fat Lady, The Phoenix, and Me.

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Still in fetal position, trying to untangle my mind, making a list of things to sell so we can still pay the home health aide so desperately needed, while simultaneously having to rewind the justice clock. (The fat lady has yet to sing as my adversary has filed yet another motion, this time saying the Appellate Court got it all wrong, not due to any misinterpretation of law or ignorance of fact, but solely because she has declared it so.) Can’t say that one took me by surprise, though.

I am so, so, tired of having to expend what little energy I have and what little time I have left, trying to fend off the constant barrage of spit-balls, cannon balls, and cow pies that certain people seem to delight in flinging my way. I have wasted too much of my life trying to understand them, trying to please them, trying to flee from them, trying to be loved by them. But I realize now it has always been a losing battle, for reasons that know no logic. I really believed that I had finally become immune to this kind of hurt but know now that I am not. I cannot change the facts. I cannot change others. What the hell took me so long to see that? My psychologist tells me the answer to that question is that I am just too good and honest and make the mistake of assuming everyone else is, too. While I appreciate the compliment to my character, if his analysis is right, it just seems so sad.

But despite all the sadness, I am proud of the person I chose to be and despite all the tears, have no regrets. So stick with me my friends, as my job now is to remind myself who I am and who are my real friends and family, and to teach myself once again how to fly with the Eagles, as this Phoenix shall rise again!

And now, some silly little images I made to cheer myself up, perhaps more suitable for a 6-year-old girl, but as I never really got a chance to be a kid when I actually was one, I am giving myself the chance now to make up for lost time. Enjoy!

Free Clip-Art / Icons of the Day

The following images are either full or reduced size previews. Simply right-click (or control-click) on the preview to save the image(s) of your choice to your desktop. (Unless otherwise noted, downloads are 512px X 512px in .png format). As always, usage of any of the images offered on this blog are free for your personal use while subject to the limitations of my Creative Commons Non-Commercial – Attribution – No Derivatives – Share Alike- 3.0 license. (See sidebar for details)

Above The Trees

Da Poodle Take OffDa Poodle Soars

Da Poodle Power

Opalescent Folder

Reading To Baby

Book It, Pops!

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I’m taking a few days off of the computer to enjoy my family and a few good books. I’ll get back to posting next Wednesday (June 23). In the meantime, I wish all you fathers out there (including my own plus me Hubby) a Very Happy Father’s Day! And I’ll leave y’all with this morning’s freebies – two original images sized to print out at 2” x 7” each, at 300 dpi (high resolution). Enjoy!

Free Clip-Art/Bookmarks of the Day

The following images are reduced size previews. Simply right-click (or control-click) on the preview to save the image(s) of your choice to your desktop. (Downloads are 2″ X 7″, 300 dpi, in .png format). As always, usage of any of the images offered on this blog are free for your personal use while subject to the limitations of my Creative Commons Non-Commercial – Attribution – No Derivatives 3.0 license. (See sidebar for details)

Proust Groucho

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Connecting Sole To Souls

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There is a part of me that feels heartsick over the fact that relationships I have with people I’ve never even had the pleasure of meeting are closer and more fulfilling than what I have with my one and only, flesh and blood sibling. My sensible side screams “BULLSH*T!”

The old maxim that “Blood is thicker than water” may be scientifically true but fails miserably as an analogy for the strength of the bond and loyalty from kin. While the opportunity for family to develop deep love and respect generally is greater than outsiders may get, there is nothing inherent in our DNA that guarantees friendship or trust. We may wish it so and delude ourselves that memorizing platitudes will make them come true but all that nets are foolish expectations and energy wasted for naught. Sadly, I don’t stand-alone in wrestling with such farce. It is exactly because this conundrum is all too common, that it’s occurred to me lately, we need to change the message.

Nature and nurture have long been debated as to which most controls who we are, yet significant as those factors may be, the most important element is choice. I suppose some believe that by drumming the sentiment that family sticks together through thick and through thin is all that it takes for self-fulfilling prophecy to flourish, but the history of man has proven that false going back as far as Cain and Abel. Genetics and training are no more than the canvas and palette upon which our individual choices build, layer upon layer of rich colors and light or the monotony of a single tone. Focusing in, one only sees their self and forfeits the depth of experience that connects sole to souls. While blood may serve to help create our potential, what we choose is who we become. So perhaps the loss we may feel over blood that is heartless should be no more and no less than the effect of a stranger, and so too, should we cherish the love.

Free Clip-Art & Icons of the Day

The following images are either full or reduced size previews. Simply right-click (or control-click) on the preview to save the image(s) of your choice to your desktop. (Unless otherwise noted, downloads are 512px X 512px in .png format). As always, usage of any of the images offered on this blog are free for your personal use while subject to the limitations of my Creative Commons Non-Commercial – Attribution – No Derivatives 3.0 license. (See sidebar for details)

City Blooms On Black Velvet

“City in Bloom on Black Velvet” – (600px X 804px)

The Fence Sitter, v2

“The Fence Sitter – v2” – For the story behind the image, read this post at Dogkisses.

The Fence Sitter

“The Fence Sitter” – For the story behind the image, read this post at Dogkisses.